How Proper Soul Got its Name

I started with:

Midnight Urbanites and the Sparkly City. It was the name of the blog I sometimes wrote on while living in Baltimore. I love the title, but not for this book. But the title was something I wanted to write about. My Baltimore ghosts exhumed for fiction...

I made a quick stop at Midnight Urbanites. Someone said it sounded like a cult, so I scratched it. Didn't feel right anyways.

Then I think it was Take Me Home. Mostly because I had John Denver on repeat. Take Me Home will always be the name of that draft-- the one that is only Bekah's POV, would offend Muslims and the Nation of Islamists everywhere, and the reader is totally, 100% in the dark the entire duration of the book.
Yep. Thank goodness for excellent, gracious, and kind beta readers.

For a long time, while undergoing major revisions, it was Needs A Title.

Then it became, Still Needs A Title.

Finally, I hit on what felt like a placeholder, but a good placeholder-- Black Mountain Ash. I combined the Black's (protagonists), their chunk of mountain and "ash" plays a significant role. It felt good. Very good. So good I could definitely query with it if I couldn't find anything better. A variation I hit on, with more literal punch, was Black Mountain Crank. I thought crank was much more kick-ass. Ash more subtle.

The only thing I didn't like about it, was it made me remember Cold Mountain was sitting on my bookshelf unread for the last two years. Boo.

But it was good. I figured it would get changed later on though...

Me and J were talking about climbing one day recently. We'd just gotten back from New River Gorge and Prana had posted this video on their facebook, where Chris Sharma (the best climber in the world right now) is talking about the how climbing is a combination of finding the right strength, the right line and the right mental strength to climb at higher levels.. it's very similar to a piece of climbing lore about a climb, Proper Soul

Back in the nineties, Steve Cater wrote a guidebook for the New, which said

 "undoubtedly a 5.14 line will go up here, it's just a matter of the proper soul, finding the proper line."

When Brian McCray put up the line on Endless Wall, that would become the first 5.14 in the Gorge, and an instant classic, he remembered this line and named it Proper Soul.

But the quote will always be remembered with the name. And it sums up everything climbing is and everything life is for a climber.

the proper soul, finding the proper line.

This line especially sums up  Bekah and Logan's story. And it became Proper Soul, which feels exactly right.

(I know editors may change this, but that's fine and I understand it's part of the business)

Here is Chris Sharma's onsight of the actual Proper Soul (5.14a) at The New River Gorge:



And my creative time wasting while revising:

P.S. I actually have a copy of the guidebook Steve Cater said this in-- and on the back it has a little stamp that says it's Y2K approved. Bahahahaha.

Proper Soul- Casting

Of course-- we all cast our novels, don't we? I still remember reading *blush* Stephanie Meyer's casting picks on her blog.

There is nothing that wastes time better than browsing the internets for pictures of people. And lucky for me, this particular set of people have not been easy to find...

My Main Characters:

Logan was/is very difficult. If you pay attention at all, you may notice a stunning lack diversity in our visual media. This is bad for black people (there seems to be about 20 black actors in Hollywood that everyone uses) and even worse for other minority's.

And let's not even go into culture's value of white beauty even in minorities. A few years ago I would have called "bullshit" to stuff like that, but I've changed my mind. It's real and it sucks.

So Logan doesn't really have a face  I can find. I think the closest to my head is Troy Polamalu.. (click for a picture).

Logan is of mixed descent. He's a rough guy with a rough background. He shouldn't look like a romance novel hero... (original picture for both Logan and Bekah are from a tumblr blog and is on my Pinterest).









Bekah was the easiest to find. As a white, blonde girl I had none of the Logan problems. This is Doutzen Kroes, and while she's a little too pretty and supermodel fabulous (Bekah should have a touch more Appalachian grit in her face), she's got the look I pictured for Bekah.









The Antagonists:

There isn't a true, traditional evil villain. But Bekah's Uncles are fluidly acting as a antagonist through the entire narrative.

William Jeffries takes these amazing photographs that convey a gritty, dark and yet very human tone. I recognize something I know well in these photographs and I think they capture the spirit of what these characters are. As follows....Frank (Shadow-- Junior), Theodore (Trigger) and Jeddidiah (Jed).

Source: 500px.com via Sarah on Pinterest

Source: 500px.com via Sarah on Pinterest

Source: 500px.com via Sarah on Pinterest

Because superiors are so much more stressful than criminals, especially this superior, Special Agent Jeanine Fairchild:

Actually, this lady looks way too nice-- in my head I picture a certain female Police Sgt. who is pretty much evil personified for me. I'll refrain from saying more on that subject so I don't land myself in jail or on anymore watchdog lists.

Random Characters:


Reggie:

Source: tumblr.com via Sarah on Pinterest

Diesel:

Source: piccsy.com via Sarah on Pinterest

Source: flickr.com via Sarah on Pinterest

I plucked this picture off Flickr thinking of both Bekah's little sister (which is a sum of like ten words in the entire book), and of Bekah as a child. It shows the farm setting, the country in the face despite the pretty girl,  the braids, and the Mennonite floral. All important elements. 

Source: flickr.com via Sarah on Pinterest

At the same time, I found this picture (I think on the same day), that represented that great dichotomy in Bekah's existence. Also, it made me think of what Deana would have been at the same age. I think one of my favorite lines is when Bekah is out in Baltimore with Reggie and thinks:

I smiled and pretended I hadn’t seen, making a mental note to scratch the bars and stars sticker off my Nalgene. God Almighty, I did not want to argue politics and southern history here, that’s for damn sure. 

Source: flickr.com via Sarah on Pinterest

My Career Plan

Let's pretend for a moment...

Let's pretend I sell my big-girl book for a half-decent (re: not insulting?) amount of money.

Once I receive an offer of representation from an agent, I'm getting my husband to switch his overtime to comp time (all his overtime goes into days off). Then, once the book sells and comes out-- it will be time for the....

drum-roll please


BOOK AND CLIMBING TOUR AMERICA: PROPER SOUL EDITION.

(this supposes there will be further editions)

Now, I've done my research. I know big book tours are like, not really that good for authors anymore. But you know what? It's a fantastic excuse! Since it's not a "big" thing anymore, there will be no problem scheduling  my hope-one-person-shows-up book readings/signing/awkwardness for bookstores outside America's greatest climbing locales.

Source: thevintageblues.blogspot.com via Sarah on Pinterest

There will be an RV.

I think I'll bring my kid brother along to help with the kids.

I'll blog our adventures (that's the only thing I'm actually buying with the $30 dollar book advance-- a new camera).

And it will be glorious. Oh so glorious. Three weeks? A month? However long it takes to keep up a schedule of climbing/book thing/climbing/driving/book thing/climbing/driving, etc.

I can even pretend this will all work as part of a larger marketing scheme-- since PROPER SOUL introduces the reader to the rock-climber world.





Source: Uploaded by user via Sarah on Pinterest


Other random "career goals" (okay, I put the joking in to demphasize how serious I am about making writing a career)

- Get on 98 Rock without being in the Jugs for Plugs segment. My husband will not like this, but the listeners of 98 Rock (Baltimore's rock station) are my target audience for the book, and they love all things Baltimore, so this one makes sense.

- Go on Oprah. Haha. Totes kidding.

-Do a lot of climbing and have like ten people who think I'm cool because I'm pretending to be kick-ass on America's Classic Moderates (this one in North Carolina is so on my tick list)

-Do a blog tour while J drives the RV.

- Meet David Simon/Ed Burns and cry my thanks for how much money they saved me in therapy/marriage counseling by ever deciding to write/make TV.

-Work hard. Do what my agent/publisher/editor suggest. Do more research on what things *I* can do in order to commit myself to making this book a success, with the knowledge that hard work makes a lot of luck.

- Take the kids to Minnesota and Manitoba with their great-grandmother. For book stuff. *cough* cough*.

This Week

I don't have much to write, but a few scattered things I wanted to post about.

I've been really struggling with getting the opening to Proper Soul nailed. The opening chapter is solid, I feel...

The next two chapters were more difficult. This article helped a lot-- Understanding the Inciting Event.

I pinned a lot of shiz on Pinterest this week. This is what I do when I'm struggling with problems in my writing and don't know how to move forward.

Some sample of my Proper Soul pinning (yeah, I still have to write a post about that):

Source: piccsy.com via Sarah on Pinterest

Source: schoengeistig.tumblr.com via Sarah on Pinterest

See the full board.

I also watched this video-- which was a thousand times better than the actual song.

It was very hard to watch. For so many reasons, on so many different levels. I find this to be one of the most interesting things about my husband-- he is not naive to our system, does not believe in it, but believes he has a role within it.
Does that make sense?
Anyways. The video is good.




And now my kid is up. Sigh.

Music in Writing

Recently I came across a thread about including lyrics in fiction, which was in itself, just a passing topic from someone who probably wanted to include like, Adele, in their writing because it just really resonated with them.

Hint: This is why writers have soundtracks/playlists for their books.

The general consensus was that lyrics and music have no place in novel writing. The rationale was, why would you ever use someone else's words in your story (which is kind of a silly thing to say if you think about it...we are always using other people's words to tell our own stories). And that lyrics without music imparted no significant weight to the text.

The thing is. It's not really like that.

I would totally use my own book for this example, but it's not really that...published. Or well-read. So, I'll use The Hunger Games. I'm sure many people read that series thinking the made up song "The Hanging Tree" was a made up song. Well...sort of.

Do you want to know what reading The Hanging Tree did for a woman from coal country with olive skin, a long braid and a husband who convinced her to bring children into this god-forsaken world? (ehem, me) Immediately I had "Hangman" in my head.





This is a song I sing to my children. A song my son requests. A song that I love in all it's renditions (Led Zeppelin's Gallows Pole, for one). It's not a song. It's a story. It's a history. And it's even deeper than it's American roots. Including a shadow of it in the Hunger Games gave me an even deeper connection to the story and reinforced the shadow of Appalachian culture.

What this is then-- is not, do not use lyrics in novel writing. It's do not waste your words. You only get so many words to tell a story, and you have to make each one count.

New River Gorge: Spring 2012

Do you know how awesome a four-day climbing vacation without children is?

It's so awesome. In ways people without kids just don't understand. God, I didn't LIVE until I had kids. Now I know-- youth is certainly wasted on the young.

Beauty Mountain Road

Before kids: A seven hour drive through the backside of Virginia and across West Virginia was like...whatever. Let's just get it over with that we can start our vacation.

After kids: WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE WHE WHE WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

Since it's early in the season, we camped at the Army Core of Engineers Campground at Summersville Lake. After Memorial Day this place is booked for the summer, but before Memorial Day it's first come, first served.

It was a great campground, but we were there-- awake-- like four hours total? Which is awesome. If you aren't hurting and dreaming about a soft mattress on your vacation, you've failed.

I'm not super motivated to write about the trip. So here's the summary:

• I on sighted and led for the first time- both which left me hating climbing and feeling pretty damn miserable about myself as a climber.
• Then I figured out the crux of a 5.10 (got 3/4's of the way through and over the crux before we had to leave) and felt better.
• Me and the husband had some great conversations about climbing, fear and our life.
• I discovered that fear is holding me back in my real life, my writing life, and in climbing.
• Nothing feels as good as climbing and hiking all day, followed by cold beer, hot food and a sleeping bag.
• I had a few moments during the vacation that made me feel like my book (re: formerly known as Black Mountain Ash/Crank, but has a new name I will share later) was real and my characters were out there climbing together. It was strange and wonderful.

Facing my Fear of Monsters

After finding the courage to tackle my fear of death and drive the final stake keystrokes into the heart of my very first book, I took my leftover courage and glanced across the yard at the little monster tied up by the shed, waiting for me.

I'd left him totally discouraged. He obeyed every command. He was appropriately mean, scary, snarling and drooling. When I looked over he kind of growled at me from the corner and then went back to sleep. Just like I taught him. I had what I wanted-- a monster WIP that was under control, manageable despite his size and something I totally understood.

But I pursed my lips and my new courage stirred in my chest. My monster was all sorts of wrong.

In controlling him, I'd taken away anything that was interesting. Out of my fear of letting him get to big, I'd starved him to skin and bones.

I had to let him loose. He needed to forage in the wilderness, get his monster groove back and return to stalk my yard with his temperament totally his own.
I needed him to be big and powerful. I needed to wrestle with him on the verge of my limits, using all my skill to bring him into a compromise of submission. I needed to always be fearful he would run away from me to return to his wilderness home. I needed to discipline without breaking his spirit. Oh no wait. That last part is about my three-year-old. My bad.

So today, I got the courage to walk over there and unchain him. He's rolling in the grass right now. I hope he strays from my clearly cut path. I hope he wanders into parts of the dark wood I'm afraid to go.
I hope I have the courage to follow.

Source: piccsy.com via Fer on Pinterest

I love having a blog. Where else can I write extended, crappy metaphors for my writing life? Nowhere else I tell you. NOWHERE ELSE. Because in real life, no one wants to listen to this kind of dribble. But on the internet, the "audience" is inherent.

Facing Down Death

The End.

I am afraid of the end. The true end. Where you got it "right" (finally) and you've done all you can to shoot yourself in the foot sell it.
The end is where you know you can't go back anymore.
Where the people you've created on your keyboard are alive, breathing, and people in their own right.
And now you must kill them.
By typing The End.

And you mourn the loss. You imagine writing a trilogy (because isn't that what everyone is doing these days?). You try and figure out how you can re-write the entire thing again.

But it's truly the end.

It's time to move onto the life and deaths of other people.

So you cry to your friends who will understand crying over an imaginary world, full of imaginary people. And said friends will remind you about your other projects.
You'll sniff and feel like it's okay. You'll remember how much you like these new people you're writing about. And how terribly messy their story is.

And it will ease the sting while you type it.

The End.

A Novel Album

Because an obscure, un-published writer's blog with one reader (Hi!!) is the only place to share ridiculous art projects done during "final read/edit for *if* anyone with a partial wants a full"

Re-visiting an old friend.

Source: travelthisworld.tumblr.com via Anastasia on Pinterest

Lily, the main character of the young adult novel I'm querying, has been with me since I was fifteen.
She started as an awkward, tough dirtbike rider with a crush on her best friend, and an annoying and creepy jerk admirer.
She evolved through a coming of age drama with a makeover that my fifteen-year-old self desperately wanted (because it's every girls dreams to put on the right shirt and suddenly be SMOKIN') and that annoyed me (because if the guy shows interest in you because you suddenly put on a nice shirt, he might secretly like boys...)
Then, sitting in the gas station in Edgewater, MD on my fourth wedding anniversary, she turned into a wakeboarder.
And the annoying, creepy, jerk admirer became the boy she was meant to be with. Funny how life changes your perspective between the ages of fifteen and twenty-five.
She grew beyond wish-fulfilment, into her own person. From Lauren (her original name) to Lily.

I got to write about a place I love and give a nod (or two) to my husband's teenage years. Lily made it easy to keep trying-- to keep writing-- and to stay humble and learn. I wanted to tell her story. I didn't know the story when I started writing, but after ten years, I figured it out.

I'm winding down the queries. Only a few people left who either have her or will get a query...
I hope she sells. I hope the sun doesn't set on her little corner of the Chesapeake. But if it does, at least her story's been told.

Multiple times. *rolls eyes*